Why it isn’t the end of the world if someone doesn’t like your class

If there’s one thing yoga teachers dread it’s a bad review or feedback that someone didn’t like the class you poured a lot of time into preparing and just delivered from the depths of your soul.

Many yoga teachers are people pleasers at heart. Everything we do is for others - to help them manage their mental health better, become more at home in their bodies, more flexible, build a better relationship with themselves.

We spend a lot of time constantly taking input from the people in our sessions. Whether it’s Jane who thinks she can’t balance and complains at every single opportunity about balance poses, Steve who complains if you don’t include any balance poses… it’s a constant push and pull between the expectations, wishes and whims of the people in our classes.

None of us are for everyone. I mean, I’m sure you can think of people you actively don’t like - I can. So, how on earth can you expect everyone to like you? It’s just not realistic to be liked by everyone. Which is really hard to let go of, especially if you’re a chronic people pleaser.

When you stand up in front of a bunch of people as a teacher (especially in a session as a guest teacher) you need to get comfortable with the inevitability that someone isn’t gonna like your style, and they’ll probably tell you. Savage, I know.

That happens because you attract a bunch of randoms when you aren’t controlling the marketing - or sure what it is you’re delivering.

I talk about the role of audience, clarity and finding students who will fit with the styles and ethos that you love and are expert in often in my business coaching practice with yoga, pilates, mediation, mindfulness teachers every day. It’s so easy to get absolutely swept up in “I want to teach anyone” or rushing to book a space at your local community venue without getting to grips with the basics of marketing your business. After all, if you don’t understand who you’re for or what it is you’re delivering - how is anyone else going to get it? It also leaves you open to this kind of negative feedback that wakes you in the night in a cold sweat.

I was teaching a class for Sweaty Betty last year.

It was a bit of a milestone as I’d negotiated that as a paid role with the store as part of their marketing activities, the first time they had ever paid a wellness teacher for their work in anything other than clothes. That felt like a massive victory for our profession as a whole.

The store had literally marketed the session as “Sunday Morning Yoga”. That doesn’t tell anyone anything about what to expect. They’d said it was an all-levels yoga class, and not much more and they also hadn’t asked me what I was going to teach. So everyone entering that space was totally clueless on what to expect; and I didn’t know who the heck was coming, either.

The session itself went fantastically. The store was packed, and after another marketing class locally was cancelled… we had a bunch of other people turn up and ended up with around 45 people sandwiched into the store, and spilling out into the garden space out the front of the store with me in the centre.

I’d picked an adaptive hatha flow with lots of choose-your-own-adventure style sequencing in it, plus some applied neurology. It was really fun, fresh and something that no one else in the area was qualified or able to teach. Plus, it was perfect for a totally mixed group as I could adapt what I was delivering to more experienced or very beginner level students so everyone had a nice experience.

After the session ended, I stayed and was chatting to the students who had turned up who had had a great time, all the feedback was great… but then - the dreaded bad review.

The manager said “oh one lady said it was too slow & gentle for her, not advanced enough - she thought it was flow”.
I said “who was it?”
The manager said “the lady in the lilac top on the front row”.

I smiled to myself.

Now, there would have been a time where that feedback would have left me reeling, upset and depressed the whole day. Wondering if I was a shit teacher, if I’d done a bad job (despite the 44 other people who had a great time).

After 6 years of teaching, truthfully, I was100% fine with this lady hating the class - and kind of relieved as well.

She’d been a total distracting pain in the ass to the rest of the class the whole way through… handstands in quiet spots and a completely different sequence everyone else, you name the faux pas... she made it. Other people were visibly getting distracted by her, the “what is she doing??” looks plastered on their faces, and I’d essentially made a conscious choice to totally and absolutely ignore what she was doing during the practice. Whatever I tried to get her on task and following along in a rough way fell on absolutely deaf ears and she was very clearly of the opinion that she was “advanced” and therefore, I wasn’t capable of teaching her. Sigh.

Now don’t get me wrong - I’m all for a bit of self exploration, but this wasn’t a Mysore practice or a free-flow section in the middle of a sequenced class. It was an all-levels mobility yoga flow in Sweaty Betty on a Sunday morning.

She said this to me afterwards as well when I bumped into her and I said “Maybe an All-levels free class on a Sunday at a shop isn’t the best place for you, it’s obviously not going to be an intense flow as that isn’t appropriate for this setting - here’s XYZ class I’d recommend instead if you want a power Vinyasa or if you’re interested in something slightly different try XYZ studio that offer Hot Flow”. And I sent her on her way, with some knowledge of what other options are around.

People like Lilac Top Lady are highly unlikely to pay to come to one of your sessions because you have a fantastic, often totally free tool that helps you make sure these people don’t even walk through your door in the first place - marketing.

To be honest, she wouldn’t have even considered coming to my class in the real world. She’d have found my website, read it, decided I wasn’t for her and not bothered showing up. Which is exactly what you want to be happening and why that clarity on your audience, your style and vibe and learning how to communicate that well is so so important.

The role of marketing is as much about repelling the wrong people, and attracting the right ones to you.

When you’re really clear with communicating what you do, for who and how, have on-point branding, a really cool thing happens. The number of wrong people in your spaces dwindles to nothing because they self eliminate and tell themselves “this isn’t what I want”, decide to go somewhere else.

That means the number of people telling you they didn’t like your class goes from a handful every week to literally zero. This is basically the only time in my personal teaching career I’ve had someone directly say they didn’t like my class.

That’s great news for you as a teacher because it protects your energy, your self confidence (particularly important as a new yoga teacher, or in the early days of your wellness journey) and therefore, your ability to show up.

Confidence in your abilities as a teacher is crucial because this is what helps you deal with the conflict of what is happening in the room, the push and pull of the student’s wishes, likes and dislikes and helps you to stand steadfast in what you want to deliver, in a way that feels good for you.

It also leaves you space for more of the right people, the ones who you dream of helping.

That person who didn’t like your class isn’t the end of the world. It’s the start of it.